{"title":"For Gamers","description":"\u003cp\u003eSarcastic shirts for gamers. Extra lives, same disappointment.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"pixels-over-profits-still-broke","title":"Pixels Over Profits -- Still Broke T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp data-pm-slice=\"1 1 []\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePixels Over Profits -- Still Broke\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMy virtual farm has twelve tractors, three barns, and a thriving agricultural empire. My actual fridge contains mustard and a financial warning.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOur \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePixels Over Profits -- Still Broke\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e tee features a green pixel-art tractor hauling crops above retro arcade lettering in green, gold, and cream. It’s a proud celebration of putting in an honest day’s work somewhere that cannot legally pay your electric bill.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect for farming-sim fans, cozy gamers, and anyone who’s ever ignored real laundry to make sure imaginary vegetables received adequate attention. You’re managing resources, expanding operations, and building generational wealth. Unfortunately, the next generation will need your login.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWear it to gaming nights, lazy weekends, or grocery runs where buying actual carrots feels insulting after everything you’ve accomplished in agriculture. It also makes an excellent gift for that friend who says they’re “almost done” while planning an irrigation system that will require another six hours.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Imagine if you put that effort into making real money.” Imagine if real employers rewarded me immediately for handing someone a potato.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe harvest is thriving. The equipment is upgraded. Your digital neighbors adore you. Meanwhile, your bank account has reviewed your achievements and would like to clarify that turnips are not an accepted form of payment.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to cart. Your character has a whole new wardrobe. You’ve been wearing the same shirt since the last harvest.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSnarkySarks. Rich in crops. Poor in currency that matters.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe \"You Actually Look Good\" Fabric\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWe might be outwardly cynical, but we secretly care about your comfort. These classic unisex jersey short sleeve tees fit like a well-loved favorite. Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (specifically the Bella Canvas 3001), the fabric is incredibly lightweight at 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²), remarkably breathable, and easy to layer. It’s perfect for both active wear and aggressively participating in leisure wear. If you want to get technical about our fabric blends:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism colors: 99% cotton, 1% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eEngineered to Survive Your Apathy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWe built these to last through all your introverted hobbies and anti-hustle weekends.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eShape Retention: The ribbed knit collar features a seam to make it highly elastic and help it retain its shape.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eStructural Support: Dual side seams are located along the sides to hold the garment's shape longer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eAnti-Stretch Tech: Twill shoulder tape covers the shoulder seams to stabilize the back of the garment and prevent stretching.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eFlattering Cut: The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eVersatile Style: The retail fit and neat crew neckline make it perfect for casual settings, semi-formal obligations, or effortless accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePrints that Do the Talking\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eOur soft cotton and exceptional print quality ensure you'll fall in love with these shirts over and over again. To make sure your sarcasm is highly legible, sleeve prints and neck labels are produced using Direct-to-Film (DTF) printing technology. This applies to products fulfilled by print providers like OPT OnDemand and Shirt Monkey, ensuring crisp, detailed designs. Alternatively, providers like TextilDruck and Stoked on Printing use Direct-to-Garment (DTG) printing for their labels to deliver vibrant colors and a smooth finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSurprisingly Ethical\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWe might be annoyed by most people, but we don't hate the planet or the workers making our clothes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eSourcing: The blank products themselves are sourced from Honduras.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eResponsible Production: Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in a humane, sustainable, no-sweat-shop way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eCertifications: They are REACH certified for responsibly manufactured, humane, and sustainable practices. They are also Platinum WRAP certified and part of the Fair Labor Association.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGeneral Product Safety Regulation (GPSR) Required in the EU\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eEU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eProduct information: Bella+Canvas 3001, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWarnings, Hazard: For adults, Blank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eCare instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: medium heat, Do not dryclean.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":46107076690116,"sku":"17353499716921266799","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Dark Grey","offer_id":46227780075716,"sku":"24044454908595030299","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Deep Teal","offer_id":46227780108484,"sku":"39717295030387528303","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Forest","offer_id":46227780141252,"sku":"13386199335822670503","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Navy","offer_id":46227780174020,"sku":"75085493907629080374","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Team Purple","offer_id":46227780206788,"sku":"21775769538267325273","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Team 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You carry your own equipment, and frankly, that level of independence deserves recognition.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOur \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWorld's Most Okayest Player\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e tee features bold white lettering and a clean baseball-and-home-plate graphic—the official uniform of someone who brings tremendous enthusiasm to being statistically unremarkable.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect for baseball players, softball regulars, weekend athletes, and anyone whose scouting report includes “usually knows when the game is.” You’re not the team’s secret weapon. You’re the reason the coach says, “Let’s just have fun out there.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWear it to practice, beer-league games, or postgame celebrations where everyone politely focuses on your positive attitude. It also makes an excellent gift for that teammate who’s never been accused of using performance-enhancing anything.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Can you play multiple positions?” Absolutely. I’m equally concerning in several locations.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe swing has potential. The catching needs context. And your biggest contribution to team morale is making everyone else feel more athletic.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou won’t break records, but you might break a folding chair reaching for the cooler. That’s the kind of highlight people remember.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to cart. You’ve spent enough time on the bench to know a good lineup needs something dependable to wear.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSnarkySarks. Average player. Elite snack selection.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe \"You Actually Look Good\" Fabric\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWe might be outwardly cynical, but we secretly care about your comfort. These classic unisex jersey short sleeve tees fit like a well-loved favorite. Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (specifically the Bella Canvas 3001), the fabric is incredibly lightweight at 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²), remarkably breathable, and easy to layer. It’s perfect for both active wear and aggressively participating in leisure wear. If you want to get technical about our fabric blends:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism colors: 99% cotton, 1% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eEngineered to Survive Your Apathy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWe built these to last through all your introverted hobbies and anti-hustle weekends.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eShape Retention: The ribbed knit collar features a seam to make it highly elastic and help it retain its shape.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eStructural Support: Dual side seams are located along the sides to hold the garment's shape longer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eAnti-Stretch Tech: Twill shoulder tape covers the shoulder seams to stabilize the back of the garment and prevent stretching.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eFlattering Cut: The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eVersatile Style: The retail fit and neat crew neckline make it perfect for casual settings, semi-formal obligations, or effortless accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePrints that Do the Talking\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eOur soft cotton and exceptional print quality ensure you'll fall in love with these shirts over and over again. To make sure your sarcasm is highly legible, sleeve prints and neck labels are produced using Direct-to-Film (DTF) printing technology. This applies to products fulfilled by print providers like OPT OnDemand and Shirt Monkey, ensuring crisp, detailed designs. Alternatively, providers like TextilDruck and Stoked on Printing use Direct-to-Garment (DTG) printing for their labels to deliver vibrant colors and a smooth finish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSurprisingly Ethical\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eWe might be annoyed by most people, but we don't hate the planet or the workers making our clothes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eSourcing: The blank products themselves are sourced from Honduras.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eResponsible Production: Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in a humane, sustainable, no-sweat-shop way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\"\u003eCertifications: They are REACH certified for responsibly manufactured, humane, and sustainable practices. 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